Letters

Even though my eyes were open to James, we were still just friends. After all, James had signed away his life for the next four years to the Marine Corps and I still had a year and half left of school. When we said goodbye, we really had no idea if we would see each other again, if we would keep in touch or if the feelings would eventually fade due to infatuation.

James is actually the first solider (or warrior as James likes to be called) that I personally know. I decided that I would be a supporter of his or more like a "fan" of his. In the Marine boot camp, the warriors-in-training have very limited access to the outside world. The only communication they were allowed to have were hand-written letters. Throughout the four months of boot camp, I wrote and he faithfully replied. I remember the first letter/card I sent- I was just so full of doubt and uncertainty, yet full of hope.

My poor brother-in-law, Anthony, was stuck in the middle of all this. James and I would use Anthony to decipher the whole "read between the lines" messages. Finally fed up with the whole 'matchmaker' business, Anthony told us to just buck up and confess the truth to each other. Mustering up my courage, I wrote a letter that basically described my feelings for James. At the end, I wrote, "If you want to pursue me, I promise, you will not be rejected."

Now, the bad thing about snail mail is that you have to wait several days/weeks/months for a reply. Finally, after about two weeks of nail biting, "I shouldn't haves", best friend wailings, reverent prayers, I get a letter from James. In the letter, I swear, word for word, he replied, "I think I sorta kinda like you."

Wow...

"I think I sorta kinda like you." Wow. How romantic? Huh? What does he really mean? Does he like me? Or is it more of a friendship kind of like? So, back to Anthony I went.

With a sigh and a grin like the cheshire cat, Anthony said, "James really, truly likes you in a romantic type of way." Giggles bubbled up to the surface as I thought, "It is true. It is a fact. James likes me!"

Needless to say, from that point on, our letters took on a different tone. He was pursuing me through his letters, telling me stories, sharing thoughts and memories. I adore the love letters from that period. I have them in a bundled, all tied up with a string. Now and then, I will leaf through the letters to be reminded of where we are and where we've been.

My joy is my warm flannel sheets on a cold snowy night.