Home Sweet Home

On December 16th, I arrived in Oahu, Hawaii. I moved into my apartment that night. Here are many pictures of my humble 16' by 18' home:

I am standing in the door way looking in.

Carolyn is standing in the doorway... 

The next four pictures provides a 180 degree view of the place.

The door on the left side of the picture is the bathroom.

The center is the small bathroom.

The left is the pantry closet.

From right to left:

 bathroom

pantry closet

kitchen

There is a small wall that ensure some privacy for my bedroom

 and it separates the kitchen from the place where I lay my head.

I have two sweet ceiling fans...  

along with the great windows, my place is very open and breezy. 

 I love it.

Obviously, I am sitting on my queen size bed. 

In the mirror's reflection, you can see my kitchen.

From the bedroom,

 looking out into my 

dining room/living room/entry way/kitchen.

Mom got this rug in Peru.

Look closely, you can see the palm branches outside of my door.

The second ceiling fan.

I love the high ceiling in this place.

In the bottom left corner, you can see my stove tops.  

To my dismay, this place does not have an oven.

My refrigerator is outside.

Here is a close up of my bathroom.

The bathroom has walls, but no ceiling.  

You can hear everyone doing their business in this bathroom.

I thought this was a cool photo. 

Even though this place is small, I simply love it.  It will do for me and James' first home together. 

My joy is feeling and smelling the warm fragrance breeze blowing gently through my home sweet home.

A taste of what is to come...

Here are a few pictures...

My joy is the sound of laughter on the beach.

Dating is an adventure.

Dating is an adventure by itself. It has the wonderful, glorious, magical moments as well as the lousy, awful, down right rotten points. Like every adventure, it is the journey, not the destination that makes it all worth while. I mean, the destination (engagement and marriage) is fabulous, but I can honestly say that I have enjoyed the period of when we were still just learning about each other as a boyfriend and girlfriend can.

Here are some high points in our dating adventure:

• Love letters- I have mentioned before that James and I mainly had to communicate through letters in the first part of our dating. Those letters are dew drops that drip reminders of how he loves me.
• Simple and meaningful conversations- These conversation were nothing big, but it meant every thing to me. They would be about anything from what we ate that day to what our dreams were of the future.
• Long instant message chats- Because James was in the Marines and I was in school, we had to do a long distance relationship. Also, because I am deaf, I couldn't simply pick up the phone. It was just done over the computer through instant messaging. Later, Skype became the main way we communicated.
• Spur of the moment trips to see each other- When James was doing more training in NC at Camp Lejune, his parents would call me up and invite me to ride down to visit him. When I moved back home for the summer, he flew up for a short 36 hours. I loved those times because they were few and far in between.
• Flowers- One time, he went on the Internet and search for all kinds of flowers on different sites and just copy and paste the pictures and sent them to me saying "I am giving you all the flowers in the world." For my birthday, he sent me a beautiful bouquet of mini sunflowers and purple Irises.
• Thoughtful gifts- For the one year anniversary, he got creative and sent me a real 'message in a bottle.' He found a site that makes the 'message in a bottle.' The message was a sweet poem that he thought defined our relationship. It was a wonderful kind of surprise.
• Holding hands-I am a hand person. His hands are big, strong and just perfect. I feel loved when he holds my hands.
• Sweet kisses- 'Nuff said. :)

Here are some not-so-great points:

• Long distance relationship- Out of the entire year and half, I believe we only 'saw' each other for about 3 months.
• Learning each other's flaws- It drives me nuts when he cracks his knuckles or bends his fingers in strange ways. I am sure I don't have any flaws. *Chortles* He finds me perfect in every way. *Guffaws* Okay... Okay... I have so many flaws, it is ridiculous (like be really obnoxiously annoying on purpose, turn off my implant and shut my eyes when I don't want to listen and push buttons until he snaps at me). The cool thing is, he loves me anyways.
• Uncertainty of whether we are meant to be together or not- When James was deployed to Iraq, he was gone for seven months. The first months plain and simply sucked. The middle months were fine and good. However, the last few months were awful. Our communications (especially mine) was poor. I was just doubting whether we were suppose to be together or if I needed to take a step back. James and I made a promise that we would be honest to each other and stick through it no matter what. I plainly told him the blunt truth-"I don't know if I want to date you anymore." Instead of getting upset or angry, my words just added fuel to his fire. He turned it up several notches and pursued me until all doubts were erased from my mind and heart.
• Goodbyes- Because of the long distance, there were wonderful hellos and dreadful sad goodbyes. Sometimes we weren't sure when the next time would be. I cannot wait till the day where I don't have to say goodbyes as much.

He is really some kind of wonderful. James is a compassionate and loyal friend. He is a lover of children and a hater of veggies. He is sweet and he is tough. He makes me feel small and protected. He makes me laugh and makes me cry. He is stubborn and he is a good listener. He can stew over a heated argument for days but he can love deeply...

Yeah, he really is my kind of wonderful.

My joy is relating with my aunt, Sonja, and twin sister, Erin, through the joyful triumphs and harsh trials of being hearing impaired.

First comes love...

After writing letters for four months, James was finally graduating from boot camp. Erin, Anthony, James Michael Sanders (a friend from college), and I drove down from Montreat College to Paris Island, SC to celebrate with his family and friends from home.

Waiting for the ceremony to start

Erin and Anthony

We arrived late to the big rental house that everyone was staying in. The next day, we headed to the big field where the ceremony was going to take place. The ceremony was nice. In a sense, I think each and everyone of us felt very patroit when the Marine marching band played the National Athem. Each and everyone of us swelled with pride when James and his platoon marched by. Finally, the ceremony was over and the soliders were released, the field became a sea of color as families, friends and the men rushed to find each other. We stayed fixed in one place as we waiting for James to find us. As he came towards us, he found Anthony first. The reunion was sweet to watch.

It was an emotional moment for us all.
Then it was my turn... I was finally about to hug the guy that I had fallen for through letters for the first time.

It was a bone-crushing-I-can't-breathe-choke-the-air-outta-me hug. Like what most tall people do, James grabbed my neck and squeezed the heck out of it. Later, I had to teach him how to hug me. To this day, he is one of my favorite huggers.

Anyways, besides almost passing out, I really enjoyed being near James, just hanging out with him and the rest of the gang. It was nothing like I thought and dreamed of. It wasn't fireworks, or even teeny tiny sparks. Instead, it was a glimmer of a growing glow and it started deep in my soul.

The Montreatiers that came down to see James' graduation.James and James MichaelJames and Anthony

That night after returning to the rental house, I told James that I had a card for him in the car. Everyone else got the clue and went inside. I gave him his graduation card and told him how proud I was of him. With a bashful smile, he quietly said thank you and asked for a walk down the street.

The streetlamps were dim and the South Carolina spanish moss hung low from the trees. The air was chilly but I didn't even care. After bumping shoulders and talking quietly, we found ourselves back in the driveway. James looked at me and asked somewhere along the lines of "Where are we going with our relationship? We both like each other so do we want to go beyond the "I think I sorta kinda like you?"

I just remember looking up into his face and simply having peace of standing near him. We both finally agreed that we would like to start dating, to offically be "boyfriend and girlfriend." After a hug, we went into the house. We were grinning from ear to ear but didn't say a word. Instead, James sat down on the couch and I curled up next to him. Everyone looked and simply just smiled.

My joy is warm hugs from loved ones.

Wedding Dress

I just went in for one of the final fittings. And let me just say this...

I love it! I just LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE my dress.

*happy, dreamy sigh*

I know I am jumping ahead of the story, but I just wanted to let everyone know.

And no, I am sorry but I can't post pictures of the dress just yet because James reads this blog. It is considered "bad luck" after all. :)

My joy is finding dresses that fit marvelously and has the perfect spin when I twirl.

Snowy Day

It is a glorious snowy day.

My twin and I share a deep love for the grand splendor that winter displays. Throughout the day, I have been remembering Erin and how much she would enjoy this day. I miss you, my snow buddy.

The first thing I saw when I walked out the door... a winter's wonderland.

I tried to capture how much snow had fallen through the night.

Perhaps this is a better example. Don't you just love it?

This was 3 in the afternoon- the snow clouds darken the day considerably.

Mom and I went to town and we just love the snowy pines.

When we left for town at 10 in the morn, half of the road still wasn't plowed.

Matthew got out the sleds! I am SO excited.
He is too.

I am so thankful that I got to experince a great day of snow before I went to a tropical place for winter. I am going to miss being in the winter's wonderland.

My joy is my brother. He makes my heart smile.

Letters

Even though my eyes were open to James, we were still just friends. After all, James had signed away his life for the next four years to the Marine Corps and I still had a year and half left of school. When we said goodbye, we really had no idea if we would see each other again, if we would keep in touch or if the feelings would eventually fade due to infatuation.

James is actually the first solider (or warrior as James likes to be called) that I personally know. I decided that I would be a supporter of his or more like a "fan" of his. In the Marine boot camp, the warriors-in-training have very limited access to the outside world. The only communication they were allowed to have were hand-written letters. Throughout the four months of boot camp, I wrote and he faithfully replied. I remember the first letter/card I sent- I was just so full of doubt and uncertainty, yet full of hope.

My poor brother-in-law, Anthony, was stuck in the middle of all this. James and I would use Anthony to decipher the whole "read between the lines" messages. Finally fed up with the whole 'matchmaker' business, Anthony told us to just buck up and confess the truth to each other. Mustering up my courage, I wrote a letter that basically described my feelings for James. At the end, I wrote, "If you want to pursue me, I promise, you will not be rejected."

Now, the bad thing about snail mail is that you have to wait several days/weeks/months for a reply. Finally, after about two weeks of nail biting, "I shouldn't haves", best friend wailings, reverent prayers, I get a letter from James. In the letter, I swear, word for word, he replied, "I think I sorta kinda like you."

Wow...

"I think I sorta kinda like you." Wow. How romantic? Huh? What does he really mean? Does he like me? Or is it more of a friendship kind of like? So, back to Anthony I went.

With a sigh and a grin like the cheshire cat, Anthony said, "James really, truly likes you in a romantic type of way." Giggles bubbled up to the surface as I thought, "It is true. It is a fact. James likes me!"

Needless to say, from that point on, our letters took on a different tone. He was pursuing me through his letters, telling me stories, sharing thoughts and memories. I adore the love letters from that period. I have them in a bundled, all tied up with a string. Now and then, I will leaf through the letters to be reminded of where we are and where we've been.

My joy is my warm flannel sheets on a cold snowy night.

It's Tradition

Every year we always get our christmas tree with the Heinzmans. We don't always go to the same place to get the tree, but we always go together.

Why? I don't know.

Perhaps we enjoy each other's company. Perhaps we love the idea of hunting for the perfect tree. Perhaps we don't have anyone else to go with. Perhaps we all have the same taste for adventures. Perhaps it is all just for the sake of tradition...

Morg found the perfect tree for his family.

Pepper

The boy didn't have decent winter clothes on so he just did it indian style with a blanket.

The family picture with our tree right behind us.

Cutting the tree

Watching Dad cut the tree

Triming the bottom

Family...

Adam and Lisa

Since the family will be heading out to HI on Christmas day, we decided to go with a small and simple tree. We actually entertained the thought of getting a fake one. Thankfully, we all banished that idea.

Mom Hauling the trees home

Sisters

more family...

These two LOVE to take pictures of themselves and posing as well. This is such a classic picture of them.

I love this one of Petra.

Matthew was practicing for his senior pictures.

My joy is watching the snowflakes falling gracefully.